Bridesmaids Luncheon

Let’s face it: Weddings go by in such a blur that after the dishes have cleared and the flowers begin to wilt, many brides realize they never really had a chance to spend some quality time with their nearest and dearest. That’s what makes bridesmaids’ luncheons so great: They afford the perfect opportunity to get together and enjoy some time with your closest girlfriends one last time before the main event. They’re entirely optional, but this fun and typically hassle-free soiree is definitely worth your while. So what does it entail? 

Think of the bridesmaids’ luncheon or tea like a reverse bridal shower in which you’re now the hostess. The etiquette surrounding the bridesmaids’ luncheon is pretty flexible, so feel free to adapt to suit your needs. The “luncheon” can be dinner, brunch, an afternoon of pampering at the nearby spa, or a group activity of some kind.

Obviously all of the bridesmaids and junior bridesmaids will be in attendance, along with your mom and your fiancé’s mom. Other attendees may include your close female relatives – sisters, cousins, aunts – as well as any flower girls. Regardless, it’s usually best to try to keep it intimate. This may be one of the few times during the whirlwind wedding weekend when you can relax and enjoy some close, quiet time with the special women in your life. Think of it as a bittersweet, fond farewell.

Unlike showers, bridesmaids’ luncheons aren’t typically centered around planned games and activities. The one constant is that you thank your bridesmaids, either formally in a prepared speech or toast, or one-on-one throughout the event. The luncheon is also a great time to present your bridesmaids’ gifts, along with any gifts to the moms and grandmothers in attendance.

A: You are not obligated to invite five people you don’t know to your wedding, nor pay for her hair and makeup especially if you can’t afford it.

Why don’t you ask her to join you for lunch, and a day of shopping. Keep the conversation light and breezy with the focus on her not your wedding plans or your fiance’. Towards the end of the day remind her that you and your fiancé are trying to work within a budget and you cannot afford to add people to your guest list or have added expenses. Be sure to let her know that you want her, all your family and your friends to share in your big day and have a wonderful time. 

May be she wants her friends added to the guest list because she does not feel comfortable with those you invited.  In that case, you  may want to let her invite one of of her friends and if she still wants all three invited, ask her to cover the cost of adding them to your guest list. 

As for paying for her hair and makeup, if you can afford it, why not pay for one or the other? Or…Why not have a sister’s spa day and cover the cost of her manicure(not acrylic)?

Also, the emphasis on individual style includes your bridesmaids. Instead of clones wearing the same dress, shoes and updos and try picking a color scheme and giving each bridesmaid the opportunity to choose a dress that shows her personality… and complements yours.

If you were inseparable all through high school and have so many memories together, of course, you want to share this experience.  DO call her and see how she feels about it.  Let her know how much you want her there with you.

My sister and her friend were so close.  They spent every day and most weekend nights together.  Laughing and giggling their way thru high school and for some time afterwards.  She was my sister’s maid of honor, then with one married and one not they kind of drafted apart.  When her friend was getting married, she contacted my sister to be her matron of honor and as fairy tales always end, they lived happily ever after.  They are still friends even when distance (Ohio vs. Florida) is factored in; taking vacations together, visiting each other several times a year, etc. 

Ask her the worst that can happen is she can say “NO”.

Q:

A: You are not obligated to invite five people you don’t know to your wedding, nor pay for her hair and makeup especially if you can’t afford it.

Why don’t you ask her to join you for lunch, and a day of shopping. Keep the conversation light and breezy with the focus on her not your wedding plans or your fiance’. Towards the end of the day remind her that you and your fiancé are trying to work within a budget and you cannot afford to add people to your guest list or have added expenses. Be sure to let her know that you want her, all your family and your friends to share in your big day and have a wonderful time. 

May be she wants her friends added to the guest list because she does not feel comfortable with those you invited.  In that case, you  may want to let her invite one of of her friends and if she still wants all three invited, ask her to cover the cost of adding them to your guest list. 

As for paying for her hair and makeup, if you can afford it, why not pay for one or the other? Or…Why not have a sister’s spa day and cover the cost of her manicure(not acrylic)?

Q: Our wedding party consists of four bridesmaids and seven groomsmen. What’s the best way to pair them up for the ceremony? 

A: Wedding parties like yours, with an uneven number of bridesmaids and groomsmen, are more common than you might think.  You do have several options to consider for both the processional and recessional. For the processional, your groomsmen could enter the church first and walk down the aisle in single file, followed by your bridesmaids. I would still have the maid-of-honor and the best-man walk down together. Or, the groomsmen could already be in the church, either at their seats or standing in front of the congregation with the groom, before your bridesmaids start their processional. For the recessional, pair the maid-of-hone with the bestman and have the rest walk back down the aisle single file of in pairs such as 2 birdesmaids, then 2 groomsmen, etc.

The bridal shower is normally hosted by the bridal party or her/his family. With so many bridal shower ideas and no set rules for showers,  the bridal shower can be as expensive or inexpensive as the givers choose.  It can be held at someone’s home, the local restaurant or even a hall.  If there are more than one shower held, such as one for the kitchen, one for those bedroom items, etc., the mother of the bride, mother of the groom and the maid-of-honor are invited to each, but not expected to give a gift at each one.

On the initial call, “Can I get some information on Wedding Cakes?” I get information on a Wedding Cake, you ask questions and I ask questions.  We find out if I have the date available, what you are looking for, etc.  If you wish more information….

We set up an appointment for a consulation and cake tasting.

Since I do not freeze my cakes, I bake a small cake for you and your family/friends to taste.

Check the Blog next Wednesday for Step 2.

Time into creating the Wedding Cake: 2.5 hours